Tuesday, October 18, 2011

what does heaven smell like...

I don't do this often, but my friend Sarah wrote something that was SO inspired that I want to share it here.  Not only do I want to send you to her page, but I put the blog on here.  Please read.  It's some good stuff... (bold and italics added)

Peter and I got married while I was still in College.  He had graduated from Seminary and I had a few years left, so he found a job at a little Presbyterian Church down a winding road twenty minutes from Asbury.  Those people became some of our dearest friends and to this day, when we are feeling discouraged or disoriented in our lives, we seek out those friends who have loved us and encouraged us and cheered for us relentlessly.This morning I was thinking of a dear lady, Sally, who went to be with Jesus earlier this year.  Let me tell you about Sally.  She was spunky.  She was a little thing . . . so little that her husband, Whitney, built her a little stool so she could sit in the pew at church and rest her feet on something.  She was a teacher to her core-- it didn't matter that she hadn't officially taught for years-- she was always teaching.  If you've heard Peter preach, you'll notice he doesn't end his sentences in a preposition.  That's because Sally took him aside one Sunday after he preached and taught him the proper grammar his Preaching Professors had overlooked.Most of all, Sally loved Jesus. 
One summer, Crawford (a little boy then, now a college freshman!) came up to Peter and asked him a question.  "Mr. Peter," he said, "What does Heaven smell like?" 

I love my husband so much, because he took that question seriously.  He didn't laugh it off as some childish inquiry.  He researched it and sat Crawford down and really talked to him about it.  For some reason, that question has always stuck in my head.

Have you ever thought about what Heaven smells like?

"For we are to God the aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing.  To one we are the smell of death; to the other, the fragrance of life.  And who is equal to such a task?" 2 Corinthians 2:15-16
Sally once told me the story of a lady she went to visit weekly.  The lady wasn't too keen on Sally coming to visit her, but Sally was part of a group of people in her "Winter Church" in Florida that would go out to care for those who couldn't get out on their own.  The lady would hardly talk to Sally and was very bitter and hardened by life.  Week after week, Sally would go to her house and sit with her, but it didn't seem to be doing any good.

And then, one week, Sally bought some lotion.  She went to her woman's house and asked her, "Would you mind if I rub some of this lotion into your hands?"  The lady nodded, and so Sally proceeded to rub her gnarled hand with her lotion.  Each week, she'd ask the same question, "Would you mind if I rub some lotion into your hands?" and each week she'd gently work the lotion into those hands.  Slowly, the woman became a friend to Sally.

Sally was the aroma of Christ.  She was the fragrance of life.

Don't we need that fragrance in our lives!?  If I'm going to heal from this grief, I have to have others surrounding me, rubbing the healing balm of Jesus into my soul.  I need encouragement and prayers and simple reminders that I'm not alone.

But it can't stop there.  Because if I'm going to heal, I also need to be that fragrance to others.  Reaching out to the downtrodden and tired, weak and weary.  This grace I've received is not only for me to take and hoard-- it is a gift to be shared.

So what does Heaven smell like?

I think it smells like us-- you and I-- doing this walk of life together.
       It's the hurt caring for the hurt.
       It's the obedience in answering the small whispers from Jesus.
       It's giving when I feel like I have nothing to give.
       It's pushing away the pride and allowing others to encourage my heart.

It smells like lotion from the hands of one to the hands of another.
It smells like Grace.

"For we are to God the aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing.  To one we are the smell of death; to the other, the fragrance of life.  And who is equal to such a task?" 2 Corinthians 2:15-16 

Sunday, September 11, 2011

for everyone

Jesus came for everyone.

One scripture that has been going through my mind lately....

Jesus said: “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.  Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart; and YOU SHALL FIND REST FOR YOUR SOULS.  For My yoke is easy, and My load is light”. Matthew 11:28-29.

Jesus didn't say that he would give SOME people rest.  He didn't say he would give only those that deserve it rest.  Shoot... Jesus, didn't come to heal the healthy.... he came to heal the sick.  He said,  "I will give you rest."  That's anyone!  

In trying to glorify God I want to be like him.  his yoke is easy, and his load is light.  I pray that every morning....  that he will give me his rest;  I pray that he will remind me throughout the day that HE has already taken my burdens.  I love him.  

I serve a mighty God.  I reach out to people because of my joy in Christ.  I pray for people often.  I love people out of my love from Christ... he has enabled me!  And, he has enabled you!  

Galations 5:1 says, "It was for freedom that Christ set us free; therefore, keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery."

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Steven Curtis Chapman - Do Everything (Lyrics)

Story of my life.
It's where I'm at.  100%.


Praying for a friend tonight and thought of this song. It's super old, but I believe, super annointed.

And, it was around the same time that I saw this picture in my email...

And, I thought... Do I allow God to heal the wounds in my own life as easily as my son allowed his grammy to heal the wounds in his teddy bear? Well, he was a bit resistant... he never did end up letting her fix his teddies ear. So, maybe we are a lot like my son. As I look at this picture I remind myself to let go and let God... he is our Healer! and he is Good!

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Friday, August 26, 2011


know Him.

love Him.

accept Him.

listen to Him.

live Him.

That's my goal.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

on my mind

"for God did not send his son into the world to condemn them, but to save them through Him."  john 3:17

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Big Lives: 2+ years

Big Lives: 2+ years: "This whole hearing loss issue with Mags has sent me for a loop in many ways. I am not sure why - I mean - it isn't cancer.

I think tha..."

Friday, August 12, 2011

please read

i may give up on this entire blog thing myself.... as in.... i might quit writing... not sure yet.  just letting you know what i'm thinking.  what i will use this blog for is to redirect anyone that cares to know me more to sites or articles that greatly influence my thinking.... so, this next redirection is to another persons blog that i found stated pretty much exactly what i think needs to be said right about now from me....  so, if you are interested in knowing more about where i'm at check it out...

http://www.geoffcocanower.com/   it's the blog on running the race.

Monday, August 8, 2011

an insatiable love

that's a pretty good description of my love for Jesus.  it can't be put out.  it doesn't dim over time.  i love him.  a lot.  insatiably.  i am thankful for resources that He has put in my life such as devotionals from Biblegateway that come just when i need them to.

in the last 24 hours i've been praying.  a lot.  and, i was SO happy and blessed to get the following email today.  it helped me come to peace with some things.  i do love Jesus.  check this out...

The Prayer that Changed My Life
Wendy Pope

"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us..." Ephesians 3:20 (NIV)
Twenty-two thousand women sat on the edge of their seats as the teacher standing center stage asked, "Do you want to have an insatiable love for Jesus?" Her words hung in the air. Then she answered, "Pray to. If you want an insatiable love for Jesus, then pray to."
Scrambling to find my pen and struggling to spell the word insatiable, I wrote these simple yet powerful words in my conference notebook. The words stung my heart. As they fell from her lips, I knew this was a love for Jesus I did not have.
What I did have was church membership, a lot of church service, and some love. While Jesus was my Savior, something was missing.
I realized I had asked Jesus to be my Savior but not allowed Him to be my Lord. I loved Him for what He did but not for who He was. At age 34, I wanted to cry out this "pray to" prayer. But I wondered, "What must God think of me?"
Service to Him had been my life. Dedication to my church was paramount. But love? How could I not really love Jesus? Certainly He would be disinclined to hear such an elementary prayer from a grown woman who'd been a Christian much of her life.
My thoughts were misguided. It was a prayer God wanted to answer immeasurably more than I could think or imagine. He wanted me to have an insatiable love for Him!
The speaker's challenge that day became a lifestyle of prayer for me. Over time the emptiness in my heart was filled with a love for Jesus I had never known. My heart not only praised Him for what He had done in my life, but now loved Him for who He was: my Lord.
My obedience and service started to flow from a heart of love instead of duty. Lies that once shaped my life and negative feelings about myself where shattered by the honesty and power of His Word. The security of knowing Him as Lord gave me what I had been looking for my whole life. I found freedom in knowing who I am and courage to live like it's true.
The promise and power of today's key verse proved faithful in my life, changing me forever. Today, I want to challenge and invite you the same. Do you want to love Jesus with an insatiable love?
If you want to, then pray to.
Humble yourself before the Lord and ask Him to help you love Him. He will give you immeasurably more than you can imagine. Over time the emptiness in your heart will be filled with a love for Jesus you have never known. Your heart will praise Him for what He has done and for who He is-your Lord. If you want to, pray to.

Dear Lord, I want to love You with an insatiable love. Answer my prayer immeasurably more than I can think of or imagine. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

I don't know if anyone that reads my blog needed to hear something like this today, but it was so powerful in my life i thought i'd share it.

Be blessed!

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Good quote from Howard Schultz's new book "Onward"

Monday, July 18, 2011


you may have noticed it too.  someone pointed it out last night.  i have this desire to study together.  and, when it doesn't work i just quit.  well, i don't really quit.  i just move on to things that work better for me.  i have been gifted with faith and encouragement.  i have a huge amount of belief in God and the things that He is doing, and it comes so easy for me.  i don't say that to brag, but to just let you know where i'm at.  and, i love giving encouragement.  that also comes easier for me because of my strong faith.  back to my original point.  i like to study together.  but, it's not easy for me to stay in one spot (in scripture) if i'm not doing it with someone.  if i'm just doing my relationship with God on my own there is so much encouragement in scripture and through people and things that i just have to move around...  and, i don't usually finish the "study" if i'm doing it on my own.  it works better for me to go where i get the encouragement from.

*hilarious*  conversation i just had with mazerick :)

he keeps falling on me as i'm sitting here on the couch and i said, "i don't know what i'm going to do with you."  and he says while laughing.... "what?  gonna put me in the garage sale?"  i laughed.  and he was like, "you know you don't want to get rid of me."  and i said of course not.  mind you the whole time we're laughing.  i was like, "where'd you get that from?"  and he was like all giggly and said "just got the idea."  ha!  what a kid :)

the main intent of this post was to let everyone (all 2 of you) that read this that the phillipians study didn't last.  i actually have been on another blog following their study of phillipians :)  bibledude.com or something like that.  and, i've been jumping all over the place when it comes to reading the bible and hearing fromm God cause well... that's the way i roll :)


Monday, June 27, 2011


philippians 2

1 Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2 then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4 not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.
 5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus

And this is just the beginning!  This is what I'm dwelling on right now!  You?

Sunday, June 26, 2011

lets study together

i would love to do an intensive study of philippians.  i would love to do it with people.... get others perceptions and thoughts.  i am going to start with chapter 1.  i will paste below both the mguiessage and the new international version.  if you could read them over and put some thought into that would be awesome.  then we can have a discussion with out thoughts in the comment section.  It would be awesome if you'd participate in this study with me!

"Lord, guide us!  Teach us new things and remind us of things  we already know of.... I love you!"

Philippians 1
The Message (MSG)
Philippians 1
 1-2Paul and Timothy, both of us committed servants of Christ Jesus, write this letter to all the followers of Jesus in Philippi, pastors and ministers included. We greet you with the grace and peace that comes from God our Father and our Master, Jesus Christ.
A Love That Will Grow
 3-6Every time you cross my mind, I break out in exclamations of thanks to God. Each exclamation is a trigger to prayer. I find myself praying for you with a glad heart. I am so pleased that you have continued on in this with us, believing and proclaiming God's Message, from the day you heard it right up to the present. There has never been the slightest doubt in my mind that the God who started this great work in you would keep at it and bring it to a flourishing finish on the very day Christ Jesus appears.
 7-8It's not at all fanciful for me to think this way about you. My prayers and hopes have deep roots in reality. You have, after all, stuck with me all the way from the time I was thrown in jail, put on trial, and came out of it in one piece. All along you have experienced with me the most generous help from God. He knows how much I love and miss you these days. Sometimes I think I feel as strongly about you as Christ does!
 9-11So this is my prayer: that your love will flourish and that you will not only love much but well. Learn to love appropriately. You need to use your head and test your feelings so that your love is sincere and intelligent, not sentimental gush. Live a lover's life, circumspect and exemplary, a life Jesus will be proud of: bountiful in fruits from the soul, making Jesus Christ attractive to all, getting everyone involved in the glory and praise of God.
They Can't Imprison the Message
 12-14I want to report to you, friends, that my imprisonment here has had the opposite of its intended effect. Instead of being squelched, the Message has actually prospered. All the soldiers here, and everyone else, too, found out that I'm in jail because of this Messiah. That piqued their curiosity, and now they've learned all about him. Not only that, but most of the followers of Jesus here have become far more sure of themselves in the faith than ever, speaking out fearlessly about God, about the Messiah.
 15-17It's true that some here preach Christ because with me out of the way, they think they'll step right into the spotlight. But the others do it with the best heart in the world. One group is motivated by pure love, knowing that I am here defending the Message, wanting to help. The others, now that I'm out of the picture, are merely greedy, hoping to get something out of it for themselves. Their motives are bad. They see me as their competition, and so the worse it goes for me, the better—they think—for them.
 18-21So how am I to respond? I've decided that I really don't care about their motives, whether mixed, bad, or indifferent. Every time one of them opens his mouth, Christ is proclaimed, so I just cheer them on!
   And I'm going to keep that celebration going because I know how it's going to turn out. Through your faithful prayers and the generous response of the Spirit of Jesus Christ, everything he wants to do in and through me will be done. I can hardly wait to continue on my course. I don't expect to be embarrassed in the least. On the contrary, everything happening to me in this jail only serves to make Christ more accurately known, regardless of whether I live or die. They didn't shut me up; they gave me a pulpit! Alive, I'm Christ's messenger; dead, I'm his bounty. Life versus even more life! I can't lose.
 22-26As long as I'm alive in this body, there is good work for me to do. If I had to choose right now, I hardly know which I'd choose. Hard choice! The desire to break camp here and be with Christ is powerful. Some days I can think of nothing better. But most days, because of what you are going through, I am sure that it's better for me to stick it out here. So I plan to be around awhile, companion to you as your growth and joy in this life of trusting God continues. You can start looking forward to a great reunion when I come visit you again. We'll be praising Christ, enjoying each other.
 27-30Meanwhile, live in such a way that you are a credit to the Message of Christ. Let nothing in your conduct hang on whether I come or not. Your conduct must be the same whether I show up to see things for myself or hear of it from a distance. Stand united, singular in vision, contending for people's trust in the Message, the good news, not flinching or dodging in the slightest before the opposition. Your courage and unity will show them what they're up against: defeat for them, victory for you—and both because of God. There's far more to this life than trusting in Christ. There's also suffering for him. And the suffering is as much a gift as the trusting. You're involved in the same kind of struggle you saw me go through, on which you are now getting an updated report in this letter.

Sunday, June 19, 2011

on following God

so, has God ever shown you something that was super crazy?  like, given you a very specific calling that you just thought was absurd?  yeah.  me too.  so, did you heed his advice and go with it?  or, did you go with your own plans?  i've done both.  actually i'm in the middle of some insane stuff that God has called me to do and it's HARD.  i am not sure, but i guess i thought being in the center of God's will would be easier.  i have heard from God.  i am following Him.... but here i am.  there are a few things that i KNOW that i KNOW that i KNOW God told me to do.

  1. Marry Michael Hullinger (he's the coolest)
  2. Allow Michael to Lead...  (follow him)  
  3. Quit your job (over a year ago now... and that was HARD!)
  4. Open a Youth Center in Bremen (what?!  I'm not qualified to do that!  i've got nothing)
well, i listened and obeyed.  and, i wish i could say it's all been easy.  i wish i could say it's all been smooth.  i love my life and wouldn't wish for another, but man is it hard sometimes.  i absolutely am ecstatic that i do get to be married to my best friend.  that's pretty awesome.  following him is kinda hard sometimes... just saying.  but, i know without a shadow of a doubt that God put me in this position and he put Michael in his position of authority to fulfill his purposes in our lives :)  quitting my job?  now that was crazy?  why the heck would i do that?  it was good money.  but, they did treat me like crap, so.... it happened.  i can't imagine what the last year and half would have been like had i stayed.  it's been the most joyous year and half of my life... being a stay at home mom... watching my kiddo so closely... it's been awesome.  i'm blessed.  open a youth center... okay.  i can do that.  sounds like a good time.  actually it quickly became something i was extremely passionate about.  i never thought i would go through everything i did in the process...  but, it's the way it is.  very soon i will have an official grand opening....  'The Den" will be run out of my garage.  sounds strange, but it's simple.  pool table, air hockey table, carpet ball table, big screen tv, video games...  fun times.  there is now a place in bremen for teenagers to just be.   no expectations.  acceptance.  yep.  God is good.  although i don't always understand what he has for me to do i know that if i trust and obey the center of his will is the best place to be.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

why i do what i do....

Colossians 3:12

The Message (MSG)
 12-14So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It's your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it.

Monday, June 13, 2011

I'm a Christian. I'm Sorry.

The above video is not about being sorry for being a Christian as some may think.  It is about being a Christian and being sorry for the stupid things that we do...  I very much agree,  and he says it so well.

Yet again, there are some things that we, as Christians, should stand up for... but we must must must do them out of love!  Here's the poem in written form in case you may have missed some of it, or just would rather read it then watch it.  (the above version is edited i believe)

I am a Christian. I’m sorry.
I’m sorry for the way that I come across
So fair and faith friendly and full of myself
Judging your spiritual health by
the words that you say
And the way that you dress, and the things that you do
Or maybe just judging you.
I’m sorry for the way that I live my life
So confident of my own beliefs that
I would never even think to think about thinking about yours
I’m sorry for the wars.
Ivory clad Crusaders mounting steeds and drawing swords
With such a spirit that if The Spirit spoke they wouldn’t hear
But you see the sword of the spirit was not a sword but the Word
And the Word was with God and the Word was God
And they preached this as they marched on the Holy Land
Singing and Praying and Killing and Slaying
And purging and healing and raping and stealing
It’s ironic that they lined their pockets in the name of God
Just like the priests who line their pockets in the name of God
Just like the people that you can’t stand, because they always raise their hand
And spread their faith and hate and judgment in the name of God
I’m sorry that I take God’s name in vain
Or rather I’m sorry that I stain the name of God
Defending my selfish actions as selfless actions pertaining to the will of God
I’m sorry for being intolerant
For trying to talk down to you
For trying to talk over you
For not letting you talk
I’m sorry for not walking the walk
For being a hypocritical critical Christian
Criticizing your pagan lifestyle while my lifestyle styles itself
Just like the televangelist’s hair
All slick and sly and slippery
As the silver syllables slide their way into your ear
But see that’s my greatest fear
That the steps I take won’t match the words I speak
So that when I speak all you hear of me
is a weak hypocritical critical Christian
Doing one thing, but saying another
Loving my friend, but hating my brother
It’s a show.
I’m sorry I get drunk on Saturdays
and go to church on Sundays to pray
for my friends who get drunk on Saturdays
And on that note,
I’m sorry for making the church about the pews and the cross
And the walls and the steeple
Because see, the building is not the church
The church is the people
I’m sorry that I hate you because you are gay
I’m sorry I condemn you to hell because you are gay
Instead of loving I jump to hatred
Mouth open and tongue preaching
Eyes open but not seeing that you are the same as me
Just a f*@!* human being
I’m sorry that I only hang out with Christian friends
And we do nice Christian things
Like pot luck dinners and board game nights
While in the night a man beats his girlfriend again
Another homeless man died again
Is this the way that my own crowd has been?
But here I am with the same friends again
But see what I always forget is that Jesus didn’t come
to hang out with the priests and the lords.
No, He hung out with cripples and beggars and whores
I’m sorry for history
For native tribes wiped out in the name of the church
Lodges burning Stomachs churning and yearning for justice
And mothers screaming and pleading
Pleading for the young ones
As they are dragged away to church schools
Where they were abused
I’m sorry for the way that I refused to learn your culture
Instead I just came to spread the Gospel
And the plague
I’m sorry that I stand at the front doors of abortion clinics
Screaming at fifteen year old girls as they enter
Instead of waiting at the back door to hug them as they leave
I’m sorry for taking my wars and my faith to your lands
When historically it was on your lands that my faith was born
And in the face of the storm, I realize that
If God is Love and Love is God
Then why are we shooting instead of sharing?
Why are we launching instead of learning?
Why are we warring instead of walking together?
Why are we taking instead of talking together?
Why are we bombing instead of breaking bread together as brothers?
You see, I think that God looks down and He’s sad
And from His right hand throne above
Jesus asks where is the Love?
And if it takes Wil-I-Am and Justin Timberlake
Asking that same question for us
To start asking that same question
Then where the f@%# are we headed?
So I will take this stage to be my chapel
And this mic my confession booth
And in the presence of God, the few, the proud,
and the blessed I confess, that
I am a Christian. I’m sorry.

- A poem by Chris Tse